There was a time when a simple
string wrapped around a finger served as the only means necessary of jogging
ones memory. Often times I'd be decked out with so much string you'd
swear I was a puppeteer. Then post
its came along. That's when yellow
became the new hue. My work station
would be festooned with constant reminders.
Prepare for audit. Send memo
regarding overtime. Dental appointment
Tuesday at 10 am. Note to self: floss! floss! floss! That would be plaque not plague.
Well I'm not getting any younger
and my retention skills, like my youth, are
fading fast. Take networking. The moment I am introduced to anyone, their
name, like Houdini or the punch line of a really good joke, immediately escapes
me. I've tried enlisting the use of the
alphabet. Many times these 26 letters
have rescued me from my rusty
recollection skills. Like the other
evening when I tried to recall the title of that Woody Allen movie about a man,
who much like all of us, had a desire to fit in and be liked. I was playing twenty questions with my
friends. "You know. He takes on the characteristics of strong
personalities. He's like a human
chameleon." And no it's not a
politician although technically, I believe chameleon to be a pre requisite for
the job of politician." Unfortunately
the movie in question was Zelig. How
embarrassing for me it was only when I got to Z that the neurons started firing. That can be a problem when relying on the
alphabet system of recall.
As a "mature" student, I would often
enlist the help of mnemonics, a simple strategy that can make memorization a
much easier undertaking, or so they say. Take the mathematical constant pi (Greek letter “π”)
for instance- the ratio
of the circumference of a circle to its diameter — which is approximately
3.1415926. NOW, with its 3 letters,
represents the first number. The
phrase,"NOW I NEED A DRINK, ALCOHOLIC OF COURSE" thus represents the first 8 digits in
sequence. Simple, n'est pas?
Thing is, I use that phase on a daily basis. Hell, it's my mantra. Now if I could only remember when and why I
would ever use pi. The only pi I am
remotely interested in ends in an "e" and is preferably apple. Perhaps not the best example.
We have all used mnemonics at one
time or another. HOMES reminded us of
the names of the great lakes-Huron, Ontario, Michigan, Erie and Superior. I before E except after C is also a mnemonic. There are a few exceptions of course
like atheist, beige, being, caffeine, counterfeit,
eight, either, feisty, foreign, forfeit, freight, height, kaleidoscope,
leisure, meiosis, neither nuclei, protein, sleigh, surveillance, their, veil,
vein, weird, zein....This is a really stupid rule.
You know what's even more stupid
are the things I do remember. I, like many a woman scorned, have the uncanny ability to remember every
rotten comment, slight, look, stare, back stabbing, low down, nasty,
irresponsible negative comment anyone has ever said to me or about me (and Rafa
Nadal). It's a gift. Well actually, it's the gift that keeps on
giving like contagions and fruit cake. I've
defriended many a Facebook follower as a result.
Like the in-law family Christmas calendar-circa 1998, featuring
an all inclusive of those that mattered
including "good ole" boyfriends and family pets but somehow
yours truly was MIA. What is it they
say? A picture's worth a 1000
words? What would a non inclusive
picture be worth? Years of resentment
comes to mind. Funny the things you
remember are some of the very things you'd prefer to forget. Like that time I woke up wearing what I
ate. I would truly like to forget that
moment in my life.
Let's face it, the older we get,
the more difficult it becomes to remember.
In my mother's day they (my elders) referred to this phenomenon as "hardening of the arteries" and
salt was apparently the culprit. As a
kid, I was simply grateful this
affliction was age discriminatory even though at the time I do not think I
could even spell discriminatory. Heck, I
sprinkled salt on my salted potato chips.
They said what doesn't kill you
can only make you stronger. Salt by that
standard, should qualify me as a circus strong man sideshow freak.
Song lyrics, historical speeches,
and phone numbers pose no threat to my memory bank. I have literally stood before the Lincoln
Memorial and recited the Gettysburg address for many a foreign visitor. Impressive, eh? Sadly,
with all other things, it's all in the timing. You can ask me who played Hannibal in the
television series and I will tell you I saw that actor at tennis city in
Toronto. He was exceptionally good in
the movie After the Wedding and he hails from Denmark and was also in A Royal
Affair. He's the same guy in Casino Royale whose eye bled
while playing cards with that hunk of a man playing agent James Bond, double 07, Daniel Craig. And he's my spouse's favourite actor. Yes, I could tell you all of this, yet I
couldn't tell you his name if my life depended on it which, by the way, favours
me. Luckily there's always something, that one
thing that will eventually jog my
memory. In this instance, a crossword
clue presented itself, "author of Far From the Madding Crowd." And there it was on the tip of my tongue,
Mads Mikkelsen. And just like that (two
days later), I have my answer. Three days later, Thomas Hardy came to me. It was April 6, 2014. (I Googled it) The news of Mickey Rooney's
passing was announced. The
mind works in mysterious ways. Work with
me people.
